It was here that I experienced my first MURDERHOPPER! Later research revealed it to be Taeniopoda eques, the Horse Lubber Grasshopper. My daughter had recently moved to Florida and told me tales of such creatures, but they sounded so fantastic that I suspected that, in addition to new fauna, her relocation had also afforded her the discovery of methamphetamines. Imagine my humbled surprise when I stumbled upon this monster! Horse Lubber Grasshoppers grow to approximately eleven feet in length (okay not really, but they are much larger than most other grasshoppers), have bright fuscia-colored wings that contrast with their black bodies, and hiss and/or emit a noxious, frothy substance from their thorax when attacked. I did not attack.